We have all heard the saying, “money is the root of all evil”. However, and at the same time, money, and having access to money, has become essential for daily living, and particularly for those of us who live in cities, where to a considerable degree, all basic necessities, such as food, clothing, housing and transportation, must be paid for.

In this day and age, being taught how to manage money at an early age is still the exception, rather than the norm. Moreover, and among us women, financial literacy tends to be rarer, as there is still the perception in some societies that, among other things, women are not good with money, money matters are a man’s role, and so a woman’s  husband, father, brother, or other senior male in the family will handle money on her behalf.

However, societies are changing, and with that, the traditional roles are also changing. More women are educated, they are getting married and/or having children later than previous generations, and in some instances, the family dynamics are changing to the point where couples manage (some of) their finances independently. In other words, increasingly, women need to know how to manage their own money – at the very least, until they settle down.

Unfortunately, many women are intimidated by money. Yes, they know how to earn it and to spend it, and might even be able to create a budget for themselves, but there can still be nuggets of fear and discomfort when dealing with their finances.

 

Fearing Your Finances

Interestingly, fear of one’s finances can manifest itself in a variety of ways, a few of which will be outlined. First, there can be feelings of anxiety around money, for example, that you don’t know what you are doing, that you’re intimidated by numbers, or that you’re afraid to make a mistake and will end up destitute. Second, and usually following from anxiety, there can be avoidance or just ignoring your finances. Ways in which this avoidance might evident include, if you avoid checking your credit card bill, bank account balances and statements, if you avoid creditors, or if you do little of no budgeting.

It is also important to highlight that there is a diagnosable illness, Chrometophobia or Chrematophobia, which is the intense fear of money, and it affects just a handful of people worldwide. Some symptoms of Chrematophobia include: refusing to deal with money; constantly counting money; becoming socially withdrawn; becoming physically ill are the mere sight or thought of money; and depression. For those suffering with this phobia , which can be quite debilitating, psychological and psychiatric help should be sought.

For the rest of us, there are techniques we can use to improve of attitude towards our finances, which will allow us not only to be more proactive, but also to feel more capable when dealing with money matters.

 

Overcoming Your Fear

Intellectually, the steps outlined below appear relatively straightforward, but as is most often the case, the challenge lies in the execution. For a successful outcome, it is crucial that you be vulnerable with yourself, and be prepared to be introspective. The root of the struggle is internal; and on the outer and as noted earlier, it may manifest itself in a multitude of ways.

 

Step 1:  Acknowledge Your Fear(s)

There is a saying that goes, “You cannot change what you don’t acknowledge”; so and in the first instance, you need to admit that you are fearful about, or intimidated by, matters related to your personal finances. Having said this, it is important to emphasise that even people who appear to be doing well financially, or are not carrying excessive debt, can have money fears or anxiety. The focus is more on the internal battles you might be having than the actual state of your finances.

 

Step 2:  Understand What Exactly Has You Fearful Or Intimidated

Once you have acknowledged your fear, it is important to pinpoint exactly what your fears are, along with what might be possible triggers for the anxiety that you feel, or the actions you subsequently take. In some cases, you may need to spend some time thinking about the root of your fear or anxiety, as ignorance about the mechanics of money or money management might not necessarily be the cause.

Additionally, and to highlight the fact that situations and their impact tend not to happen in a vacuum, it is recommended that you also spend some time examining the impact of your fear not only on your finances, but also on your life, and your future.

 

Step 3:  Take Action To Overcome Your Fear.

In identifying exactly what are the source(s) of your fear or anxiety, you will be in a better position to remedy the situation – which may be different for each person. For many people. ignorance, or financial illiteracy, is at the source of their fears. They do not know enough about managing their money, and this can be remedied through books, videos and courses, etc.

For others, their fears may stem from their personal assumptions about money, and/or from familial expectations or societal pressure. Tackling these fears may be more challenging and so tend to require consistent effort to rewrite your money script, which are the subconscious messages you have been telling yourselves. However, it may also be necessary to secure expert support, as the messaging can be deep-rooted, and may be a challenge to overcome on your own.

 

Step 4:  Tap Into Support System

Finally, and having learnt more about managing money, and having done the work to tackle the mental blocks you might have had, it is still easy to backslide, as the change will continue to require effort until it becomes second nature. Many of us do well in being part of a community of likeminded people, who share similar struggles, to whom we can be accountable, and who can offer us moral support when needed. For others, the support system might be just one or two people, who can help them keep on track. However, the point is to have people in your life, either in person or virtually, who you can talk to about your money fears, so that you don’t feel as alone.

 

 

Image: mprietou (Pixabay)