The daily grind is real. From the time we wake up until the time we go to bed, we are constantly on the go trying to fulfil all of commitments. To a considerable degree, we end up functioning on autopilot – just trying to do all that we need to do, with as few hiccups or setbacks as possible in order to get up the next day and do the same thing.

When we were younger, we had great plans for our future and the life we thought we would have. However, our current life may be far removed from what we had imagined, and even who we thought we would become.

Sometimes, the visions from our younger days could just have been pipe dreams, but if we are honest, we are not happy or fulfilled in the life we are living. We may be feeling more like a shadow of who we truly are, and hope to unlock ‘something’ that would make us feel more connected to our lives. That something could be the intention that should underpin everything we do, and consequently help us to live more intentionally.

 

What does it mean to live intentionally?

The word ‘intentionally’ has become a bit overused these days, but it has become increasingly important to explain the mindset we ought to possess, especially since we have all become more aware of our mental health and the need to protect it. To be clear, when speaks of being ‘intentional’, it means that we are being deliberate in what we are doing. In other words, we acting or behaving a particular way on purpose, or with a purpose in mind. Hence, living (or existing) on autopilot can be at odds with living intentionally.

 

1.  What are your core values and priorities?

As the very first step, you ought to be clear about who you are and what is important to you. Being clear about your values, priorities and vision for your life, will form the basis of your moral compass, whilst also helping you to identify what matters, most to you, along with the areas of your life you should be giving your energy.

At some point or other, you are likely to have done exercises to help you set goals and priorities for your life. However, after completing those exercises, you may forget about the results, as you have not fully integrate them into your life and decisions. As a result, you may find yourself taking on activities or a mindset that does not serve what you say are the priorities of your life, or your long-term goals.

This step is ought to be a welcomed reset: to bring you closer to your essence –  the things you value, and the vision that you have for your life. Ultimately, the goal is to align your outer life with your inner core, and that journey start starts on the inner.

 

2.  Accept responsibility for your life

One of the biggest lesson you learn as an adult is the fact that you are responsible for your life. For most of us, the fullness of that realisation does not occur when you are considered legally of age, at 18 or 21, depending on where you live. Frequently, you only grasp the magnitude of your responsibility as an adult in your mid-to-late twenties. It is only when you look back that you realise that in your late teens and early twenties, when you thought you were an adult, you didn’t fully understand what it meant.

To that end, you ought to appreciate that to a considerable degree, the life that you have is a result of the choices that you have made. Living your life on autopilot, or not aligned with who you are and who you want to be, reflect the decisions you have made. You are not powerless in your life. And accordingly, you can change what is no longer serving you, or is not aligned with where you want to be.

To be clear, that change will not be easy and may not happen overnight. It will require hard work, commitment on your part,, making tough decisions, and being prepared to see them through in order to get closer to the life you want, and to be in a position to live more intentionally.

 

3.  Take your commitments seriously

One of the basic laws of life, which is rooted in British common law is, “Do all that you have agreed to do.” It means that if you have agreed to do something, you recognise the responsibility you have taken on, and will do your utmost fulfil it. In recognising the gravity of a commitment, big or small, you are less likely to make promises you cannot deliver.

All too often, and especially among women, we can find it difficult to say no. We thus take on more than we should, and suffer the consequences, such as increased stress, fatigue and ill-health.

To be more intentional, it starts with your word. There is honour in keeping your word – to yourself, and to others. However, it starts with you being clear to yourself and to others, by being mindful of the promises you make, and having the courage to say no.

 

4.  Do your very best

This step can be easier said than done, especially when your to-do list is long, and you are continually thinking about how you can best juggle all of the ball you have in the air. To do you very best requires you to be present in what you are doing. You ought not to be thinking about what you should cook for dinner, or how you can juggle your kids’ after school activities, whilst working on a report at 9:00 a.m. Instead, try to give everything you do your very best effort, so that the very best outcome can happen.

Often, we make a half-hearted effort, but hope it is enough to give us the results we want. However, that rarely happens, but then become regretful or angry at the world, when we had some control of the situation and frittered the opportunity away.

 

 5.  Be consistent

Finally, in putting the above four steps into action, you will not get it right all the time or from the get-go. There will be setbacks. You will fall back into old habits, but do not be discouraged. It takes practise to change past attitudes and behaviour. So dust yourself off, course-correct, and continue on your journey to live more intentionally.

 

 

Image: Lisa Baker (Unsplash)