To some degree, we are all risk averse. We try to limit or avoid risky situations that could compromise our health, peace of mind, and just the current equilibrium of our lives. However, as we get older, our choices tend to become more conservative, and often, we are embarrassed by some of the decisions and seemingly “reckless” actions we took in our youth.
However, one of the things we tend not to realise is that being risk averse can be a slippery slope – of sorts. Almost without you realising it, you become more and more conservative, which in turn can restrict your horizons, and ultimately paints you into a corner.
Here at Journey to Growth, our greatest wish is for you to have your greatest adventure – much of which will be internal – and live your best life. So, limiting your horizons is contrary to that objective!
Having said this, experiencing personal growth does not mean skydiving or bungee jumping – unless that is what you are into! Instead, the emphasis would be on doing things that just thinking about it make you uncomfortable and would wish to avoid.
You Are More Than Just Your Fears
As human beings, we enjoy, and perhaps even thrive, in comfort and stability. Stress and anxiety are at a minimum, and there is some semblance of predictability, which allows us to plan and feel in charge of our lives. However, it is also easy to get too comfortable and so not have new experiences through which to learn and grow.
When you have an opportunity to have a new and different experience, the odds are you can find a million reasons WHY you should stay in your current state and not allow that new experience. And suffice it to say, many of the reasons might have some truth, for example, that you might endanger yourself (however slim that might be) or be overwhelmed. However, to a considerable degree, these types of thoughts are more about self-preservation and do not necessarily allow you to tap into your intelligence, resourcefulness and life experience so far all of which will help you deal with whatever challenges you may face.
Going Inside to Step Outside
Having said this, silencing the naysayer in your head can be terrifying. It feels as if the stakes are high if you go against it, and the “no” in your head may persist for a while even after you have said “yes”. To a considerable degree, that internal battle is a battle of wills – where even with internal opposition, you still choose to walk through your fear.
However, getting to that point requires self-awareness. It is important to recognise the boundaries of what is safe and comfortable for you, and what is outside your comfort zone. As part of that process and give you greater clarity, consider making a list of what makes you comfortable and your discomforts. Truthfully, you may be surprised by the items you have listed, but they ought to be acknowledged and each investigated further to better understand what might be the underlying fear.
Getting Comfortable with the Uncomfortable
Now, having spent some time unpacking your discomforts, you may realise you might not be able to rationalise or somehow convince your fear to disappear. The fear may always be there, but you still choose to act contrary to it. However, do note that it may be a decision that you will repeatedly have to make: to not run away from the discomfort.
It is in confronting your fear that you get stronger and more confident in your ability to handle situations that scare you. To be fair, you may stumble and execute with gracious aplomb, but extending yourself a bit more than you are comfortable with should be considered a success.
Learning Experiences
Finally, it is important to highlight that all of your experiences – good and bad, successful and unsuccessful – are opportunities to learn more about yourself and what you are capable of. Often, we underestimate or don’t give ourselves enough credit. We underestimate our resilience and strength, and stepping outside what is comfortable and safe can remind you of parts of yourself that you have not tapped into in ages!
Do recall that inherently, we tend to like safe and predictable, but these are not the circumstances that encourage personal and internal growth. Situations that test and challenge you internally really show you who you are and what you are made of, which is a lot more than you think!
Image: Markus Spiske (Unsplash)
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